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How To DM a Girl And Actually Get Her To Respond

December 8, 2021
By: Zephaniah Munro

Many successful hookups started with a DM. Of course, the person who got the DM needed to respond to it before things went any further. It's not hard to send a message once you've mastered basic spelling and phone use, but are you guaranteed a response?

Of course, you aren't! Nobody owes you anything, so don't believe that you deserve the courtesy of a reply. A girl replies to people who are compelling enough in her opinion, so what you need to think about is how to become compelling yourself.

It's much simpler than you think, so pay attention and take notes, because that hookup is only a few messages away.

Calm Your Hormones

Look, you're ready to meet and fuck either through a fuckbook or not, and that's fine. Obviously, she needs to know that if you want her to spread her legs, but could you slow it down a bit. There's no need for you to open by describing to her how good you are at chowing down on her or how good your thrust is.

There are a few women that this work with, but they are usually the ones you should avoid. If you want any half-decent girl to give you a second look, don't throw your penis out there. If you do, that picture is typically the first and last place she sees it.

Not looking for a relationship is fine. Being the type of person that prefers to get to the point is fine. However, there is a right and a wrong way to go about doing so.

Accept Your Failures

So, as you know, there's a bit of a beard craze with many women. Those men who can't grow a full face of hair seem to be at a tremendous disadvantage. What you may not realize is that women like a groomed man.

If she's thinking about sleeping with you on her carpet, there's no reason for you to look like the carpet too! Groom the beard and keep it organized. There's no need for it to be growing behind your ears and down your neck.

Most importantly, don't send multiple messages back to back. Even if a girl had planned to respond to you, the moment you start seeming desperate is the moment you can kiss your hookup goodbye.

Don't be the guy who sends double and triple messages to get her attention or to "check" if she got your previous messages.

Stay in Your Element

There is no man on this planet that is appealing to every woman. It's just like there are women that you don't find appealing. If you disagree and you find every woman attractive, then wow…. That's impressive!

The point is that unless you're good at reading every woman or you are good at choosing your battles, expect some unanswered messages. Just move on and focus on the next girl.

Most importantly, don't send multiple messages back to back. Even if a girl had planned to respond to you, the moment you start seeming desperate is the moment you can kiss your hookup goodbye.

Don't be the guy who sends double and triple messages to get her attention or to "check" if she got your previous messages.

Text with a Purpose

If you're going to DM a girl for the sake of messaging her, don't bother. Your goal may be to hookup, but you can't always express that in your DM. Therefore, you must find a way to create another purpose that leads to this through sexting with sexting apps.

So, maybe you can play it off as just inviting her out for drinks one night. With such a purpose, you can tailor your messages to that outcome. If you're just texting and "hoping for the best," you may end up sending some very useless messages and boring her.

Get into Her Peripherals

Before you jump straight into sending messages, allow her to notice you in more subtle ways. Like one her pictures or leave a comment. If you're opting for the latter, then at least ensure that your comment doesn't make you seem needy or like a creep. Who knows? You may even give her a reason to DM you first.

Don't go overboard with this though, as you may come off as just another thirsty guy when you start liking and commenting on just about everything she puts up.

Use Her Status

This is one of the easiest ways to slide into DMs because it gives you a reason to talk to each other. Don't just jump on any status she puts up. Pick your move carefully by choosing one that you can foresee leading to a reasonably long conversation.

Ensure what you say about it is conducive to the said conversation. When she sees your message, she's less likely to feel as if this is just another dude looking for somewhere to put his dick.

Sex Is the Endgame

Remember, casual sex and creating a fuck buddy is your objective. If you use it to make the journey relevant, you may fail much more than you succeed. Even if your interest is hooking up, a woman is way more likely to give you the time of day when she feels as if there is something else there.

So, if you're feeling the urge to start your conversation with something like "DTF?" go flush that filth down the toilet and try again.

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